Life in a (Smaller) Northen Town

So although I am a prosecutor in a small Alaska town I am still one of many. However I am also responsible for yet another smaller town and surrounding villages. We call this a "bush"
assignment and at least I don't have to say I'm an assistant DA there but the DA. I travel there one to two times a month and if I drive its about 5 hours. That is a long time...so I tend to speed...

Now I haven't got a ticket since I was 16. But on my second to last trip I got busted going through a town midway to my town. You may think that I would have nothing to fear but the pucker factor was still pretty high.

To get the full story...I used to be a cop. My police in the bush are great and I get to go shooting with them when I go down there. So I had recently purchased this junker gun at a police auction and took it with me. I blasted a lot of little cardboard people and had them in the front passenger seat on the floor. So the Trooper pulls me over and I'm embarrassed. I think at least I know all the Troopers in this area...and then a female Trooper gets out of the car. This is news to me.

I say hi. And sorry. She has noticed that I am in a State car and have boxes of ammo and dead cardboard people everywhere. "Been shootin?" she asks. "Yeah. I go with the cops," I say. She nods, looking like she can't decide if she should draw her weapon and await backup. I explain where I'm coming from. All the while I'm thinking if I tell her who I am will it seem like I'm expecting to get out of a ticket? Will I get fired? For speeding?

She finally can't take it. "Who the hell are you?" I explain. I tell her I'm mortified. Please write me a ticket. She doesn't know that I actually slowed down about 20 miles out of her town. She gives me a warning. She told me she didn't want to run State plates before.

So whew. About 4 other cops have ribbed me for getting pulled over. Now Alaska is a big place. They work hundreds of miles away from this Trooper but the story is out. The problem for me is now in the story I'm going such a crazy rate of speed as to be impossible in the State car. I've heard other variations on my driving that day. A couple of weeks later I was "on call", a lovely time that I'm glued to a phone all day and night whenever the police need help or to ask a question, etc. My new Trooper friend calls and my wife answers. "This is Trooper ____. I recently met your husband passing through town."

The last time I went to the bush I flew.